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Wednesday 10 July 2013

What should alarm you in the letters you receive from Russian women?


If you have already written to several women, and especially if you were “lucky” enough to come across scammers, you’ve probably noticed that different women write different type of letters. There is a special category of letters, in which women start talking about love way too soon. In the second or third letter to you they already write that they are in love, that you are the one and only man they’ve been waiting for, et cetera. Of course, it’s flattering to read such things, and what single man wouldn’t want to hear something like that, especially if he normally doesn’t get too much attention from women? Here we have a young Russian beauty telling him she loves him. How could anybody resist? Full of joy, you’ll send her money and presents, and that’s exactly what she is trying to get.

Very often such “love” letters are written using the same sample, and only the men’s names change. It’s really easy to find these samples in English in the Internet; you don’t even need to spend time on making it up yourself. Also, one could buy the whole book of sample letters and use a different one every day.  

These kinds of letters can have a very strong psychological effect on a single person. It can be considered a type of a psychological weapon – a manipulation tool. It is similar to how governments and media manipulate their subjects. Of course, manipulating one person cannot be compared to a large scale manipulation of an entire nation, but in terms of how it works it is essentially the same. When a man hears that he is loved, he seeks to fulfill a role given to him by the nature itself – a role of a protector.

In psychoanalysis, there is something called “archetypes” – a concept, created by Carl Jung. One of these archetypes is the Protector. A “protector” mechanism exists in every male’s mind, so when a man hears about love, it flatters his ego, and subconsciously he feels the need or desire to protect, provide, or just make a woman feel good. His subconscious is telling him, “So what if she is not my ideal woman? She says that she likes ME, so she needs me. She needs my protection and support. By the way, she is not that bad after all…”

Dear men, trust me, Russian women don’t function like this. If a girl is serious about a relationship, she will never write love letters without seeing you in person first. She is smart enough to know that only a real life meeting will show if any true feelings can possibly form between you two and if a relationship can develop. A serious woman won’t feed you love words in advance.

Foreign men often conclude their letters with kisses, call a woman “my dear”, or even add “I love you”. When women receive such letters, they usually ask me, “How can he tell me he loves me if he hasn’t even seen me once?” I have to explain that this has to do with cultural differences. For people from different countries the words “I love you” can mean something less serious, for example, “I like you”.

Without a doubt, a love letter is a very romantic thing. It’s a quest! But everything has to be done at the right time. So, when you receive this type of letter, think about timing. Is it suitable to talk about love at this particular moment of your relationship with a certain woman? If the answer is “no”, it might be a reason to become cautious.